Top Executive Coaching with Tony Mayo

One of my favorite radio programs and podcasts is the non-denominational, non-doctrinaire Speaking of Faith with Krista Tippett. Krista interviews deep thinkers with important ideas about the essential human experiences of awe, eternity, and community. Every show leads me to reflect deeply and, very often, to live a happier, more involved life. I consider it one of the most nurturing practices of my continual development as an executive coach.

A recent guest was Esther Sternberg, Ph.D., an expert on immunology and stress. She relates the remarkable history of stress’s role in heath and healing. It seem that every culture has always known that emotional and physical stressors contribute to

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Your disposition in this moment constrains the actions you might take in the next. If you are sitting at a desk you cannot immediately leap forward. If you are angry, you are not able to gently embrace your antagonist. If you are speaking loudly and quickly, you cannot listen to subtle cues.

There is a place from which the broadest variety of actions is possible: the

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The Relaxation Response
by Herbert Benson, M.D.
with Miriam Z. Klipper

Reading and using The Relaxation Response may have saved my life in 1989. It may also have destroyed my life, for it turned out to be the first paving stone on a spiritual path which lead away from much of what was accepted and familiar. I left behind the person I had known myself to be and became a person I could not have predicted. The path brought me to most of what I treasure today.

I was a thoroughly Western, rational, mechanist, Ayn Rand Objectivist, John-Wayne-style “I’ll do it myself” individualist whose life was thoroughly unsatisfying. Each day I came home from a thankless, stressful job to a cold and chaotic home. I would sit on the couch and feel as though worries and disappointments were

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A wonderful, apparently unique, skill of humans is the ability to weave the recalled events of the past and the anticipated events of the future into a meaningful story that supports how we feel now. Tragically, we are too often the victims of this skill when we could be its master. Most of us spend more time in this story of memory and speculation than we do in the actual present experience. We forget that the “now” is the only experience any of us truly know as we endlessly evade the present by engaging in regret or worry.

I saw a small example of this recently in my CEO executive coaching group. One member mentioned that

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Business Week has a short article about Jerry Levin, the former head of Time Warner. He lead the merger with AOL. The merger is generally considered a disaster for Time Warner and Levin left under pressure. What did he learn?

From the article and his life after leaving the executive suite, it sounds like he learned how to learn:

…understanding that it’s O.K. to be open and vulnerable, to ask for help.

To state it in different terms, it’s probably helpful to invoke the feminine principle and be compassionate, empathetic, understanding, give respect to everybody, don’t get deluded by the natural hierarchy. And don’t get too self-satisfied that you have all the answers.

He has gone on to establish a holistic retreat, Moonview, with his wife. What learning is he most eager to share with executives?

My strong advice would be to find a calm, meditative state every day. With the tempo of executive life, that seems almost impossible, but it’s probably the most important thing that you can do.

Namaste, Mr. Levin, and thank you.

See also Gandhi on silence.

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